It's been a whole month since I posted and I have to admit that its not because I'm enjoying life as a new super slim svelte goddess - quite the opposite actually.
I've actually been ready to give up the whole dieting malarky, convinced myself that I obviously deep down do not want to lose weight because if I did then I would just do it already - that's how it works isn't it? Yup, that is seriously where my head has been at - it's too hard to keep torturing myself over the same old weightloss issues so I'll just convince myself I'm happy as I am! We've all been there I'm guessing!
So what changed? Well, although I was telling myself those things I didn't truly believe it. I am sick and tired of this bloody vicious circle of diet, lose weight, feel great, binge, gain weight, hate myself. It really has become tedious and exhausting - 22 bloody years later.
I realised that I dwell way too much on the past and admit that maybe I use past experiences as excuses as to why I am the way I am - while I accept that my past is part of who I am it shouldn't really have such a hold on my future should it?
I cannot change the past but I can sure as hell change my future.
I've been checking out CBT self help sites on the tinterweb as I can be a very negative, cup half empty kind of person that needs constant validation from those I love. I've become very 'what's the point?' or 'it won't be good enough anyway' in my attitude toward things I used to enjoy doing such as gardening and crafting. I've now got a humongous list of things I would like to make or do or achieve but know that I will never do them because either a) I've made them totally unrealistic (but still berate myself for not being able to do them) or b) I prefer to know I could do them and leave it at that than to attempt them and get it wrong or be rubbish at it.
So I found a good CBT site that helped me to understand negative thought and learn how to turn those thoughts around to positive ones. Don't get me wrong, I'm not suddenly cured, in fact it's going to take a long time but it's already changing my way of thinking.
I also found a site called 'Healthy weight centre' which gives you questionnaires to fill in and then help you to understand your answers and see where your train of thought is going.
I am new to both those sites so I haven't made full use of them yet and I suspect it needs to be a daily drip feed of visiting them to start with but I'm now feeling hopeful and positive.
I am not going to lose weight overnight - I have to accept that, I'm not going to lose weight just by exercise alone either - I have to learn to eat mindfully, but it suddenly doesn't seem so daunting.
"Within each person there are two dogs fighting; one that is positive and one that is negative. which one wins? The one that you feed"
Wednesday, 9 April 2014
Saturday, 8 March 2014
Vitamix
I've wanted to get into smotthie making for a while now but I only have a stick blender and the few attempts I made at pulverising fruit were really not what I expected.
I love strawberries but they tasted absolutely foul when blended and I really couldn't get a good ratio when mixed with other fruits - basically I gave up.
Since doing Insanity I've been relying on Lucozade sport to get me through a workout and as much as I love the taste of the drink I'm fully aware that its ingredients aren't exactly desireable when trying to lose weight.
So I've been looking at juicers for some time and as good as some of them look the fact that they extract juice from the skins and pulp which is then discarded has put me off buying one - most of the goodness is in the bits that are discarded.
So what to do? Well a few years ago I bought a Vitamix off QVC for a ridiculous amount of money, the presenters claimed it could make soup, smoothies, ice cream, various milks and much much more. When the machine arrived here I immediately chucked veggies in and made hot soup - flippin eck it was disgusting. It tasted like raw grass.
I was already cheesed off because the machine had taken 2 weeks to arrive and then it only got here because I travelled 100 miles to pick it up, so when the soup tasted foul I quickly wrapped it back up and made QVC come collect it. Boy have I regretted it ever since!
5 years later and I have taken the plunge again, I am now waiting for the arrival of my Vitamix from QVC, excited doesn't quite cover it (insert huge miley face here).
This machine is going to be put through its paces within the money back guarantee time, it won't be going back unless the darned thing breaks on me.
I'm now scouring the net for various recipes. As well as a pre workout smoothie, I'd like to find a recipe that would make a smoothie that would get my husband through the day - he's a builder and refuses to eat all day - so maybe something with oats!
Here's my Vitamix in all its gorgeous glory - oh Vitamix you WILL change my life.
I love strawberries but they tasted absolutely foul when blended and I really couldn't get a good ratio when mixed with other fruits - basically I gave up.
Since doing Insanity I've been relying on Lucozade sport to get me through a workout and as much as I love the taste of the drink I'm fully aware that its ingredients aren't exactly desireable when trying to lose weight.
So I've been looking at juicers for some time and as good as some of them look the fact that they extract juice from the skins and pulp which is then discarded has put me off buying one - most of the goodness is in the bits that are discarded.
So what to do? Well a few years ago I bought a Vitamix off QVC for a ridiculous amount of money, the presenters claimed it could make soup, smoothies, ice cream, various milks and much much more. When the machine arrived here I immediately chucked veggies in and made hot soup - flippin eck it was disgusting. It tasted like raw grass.
I was already cheesed off because the machine had taken 2 weeks to arrive and then it only got here because I travelled 100 miles to pick it up, so when the soup tasted foul I quickly wrapped it back up and made QVC come collect it. Boy have I regretted it ever since!
5 years later and I have taken the plunge again, I am now waiting for the arrival of my Vitamix from QVC, excited doesn't quite cover it (insert huge miley face here).
This machine is going to be put through its paces within the money back guarantee time, it won't be going back unless the darned thing breaks on me.
I'm now scouring the net for various recipes. As well as a pre workout smoothie, I'd like to find a recipe that would make a smoothie that would get my husband through the day - he's a builder and refuses to eat all day - so maybe something with oats!
Here's my Vitamix in all its gorgeous glory - oh Vitamix you WILL change my life.
Thursday, 27 February 2014
Bucket list.
So, I was driving into Wick today and as is prone to happen on boring, lonesome journeys I started thinking about random things. Todays randomness was my bucket list. I actually do not have a bucket list but I got to thinking about what I would put on it if I did. Here's what I got
1) Visit New York, Atlanta and New Orleans.
2) .........................Erm.............
Yup, that's the extent of my bucket list, the extent of what I want to do before I die. What I can't work out is whether my lack of objectives is a good thing or a sad thing - is that I've done all I want to do or I just have no imagination!
Have you noticed anything yet?
As I continued to drive along, desperately trying to think of things to fill the list out and realising I had no inclination to throw myself out of a plane, swim with sharks nor write a novel something dawned on me "oh. wow. I didn't even think about weight loss".
I wonder what Freud would have to say about that?
To be honest although I want to lose weight I don't want to have to - does that make sense? I want to be happy with the way I look at the size I am and I want to never have to bother with losing weight ever again. But......there it is....... such a small word with so much meaning - but! The truth is I know how I look to other people and I know that it's generally accepted that I need to lose weight. I want to buy clothes and know that a size 12 will fit, I want to feel good wearing nice clothes and I want to be comfortable having my photo taken.
On the upside, today I realised something. I've been telling myself that I need to lose 5 stone to look half decent and be at an ideal weight however today I realised it's actually 3 stone I need to lose not 5 - how bloody cool is that :)
Tuesday, 25 February 2014
And so it begins!
I joined 'Dietbet' again and the challenge starts today - I now have 1 month to lose 8.6lbs. A very doable amount I'm thinking.
Now begins the real challenge of being aware of everything I put in my mouth and avoiding those situations where I just want to sit down and munch on chocolate. With that in mind the knitting needles have made an appearance and I've started knitting for my niece/goddaughter who is expecting her first child in June.
Insanity is still keeping me on my toes. Last week was the beginning of the second month but one thing after another kept getting in the way and we had some really bad workouts - I even stopped a workout halfway through which I have never done before - but we were both so tired and fatigued that we were in danger of causing ourselves an injury
This week we started week 6 over again - oh yeah, we're committed - and I have to say that I can feel it in every single muscle in my body, to the point where we could easily have missed todays workout. However we di press play and despite finding it ridiculously hard we loved Max Interval Plyometrics, I'm currently typing this knowing that getting up afterwards is going to be exceedingly hard and painful.
I came across an interesting link today on FB. I don't really follow any nutritionists on FB bar one lady, her story is inspirational and she keeps everything so real and true to her own beliefs. She's not into quick fixes nor fad diets nor diet drinks, it's healthy, wholesome, fresh food all the way and exercise relevant to each individual - it's not a one suit fits all attitude. So refreshing!
Anyway, I found an interesting link shared by Lucy on FB today and I wanted to share it here, it's an interesting read on fruits and vegetables by John Berardi and Ryan Andrews for 'Precision Nutrition'.
Here's the link
http://www.precisionnutrition.com/color-chart
Enjoy!
Now begins the real challenge of being aware of everything I put in my mouth and avoiding those situations where I just want to sit down and munch on chocolate. With that in mind the knitting needles have made an appearance and I've started knitting for my niece/goddaughter who is expecting her first child in June.
Insanity is still keeping me on my toes. Last week was the beginning of the second month but one thing after another kept getting in the way and we had some really bad workouts - I even stopped a workout halfway through which I have never done before - but we were both so tired and fatigued that we were in danger of causing ourselves an injury
This week we started week 6 over again - oh yeah, we're committed - and I have to say that I can feel it in every single muscle in my body, to the point where we could easily have missed todays workout. However we di press play and despite finding it ridiculously hard we loved Max Interval Plyometrics, I'm currently typing this knowing that getting up afterwards is going to be exceedingly hard and painful.
I came across an interesting link today on FB. I don't really follow any nutritionists on FB bar one lady, her story is inspirational and she keeps everything so real and true to her own beliefs. She's not into quick fixes nor fad diets nor diet drinks, it's healthy, wholesome, fresh food all the way and exercise relevant to each individual - it's not a one suit fits all attitude. So refreshing!
Anyway, I found an interesting link shared by Lucy on FB today and I wanted to share it here, it's an interesting read on fruits and vegetables by John Berardi and Ryan Andrews for 'Precision Nutrition'.
Here's the link
http://www.precisionnutrition.com/color-chart
Enjoy!
Friday, 21 February 2014
Noodles - yum yum.
It's been too long since I last posted but I really didn't know what to post.
Leanne and I are now in the second month of 'Insanity' and the workouts are really hard, kind of like being back to day 1, but we're still loving it.
This is pretty much my daily look now
Red and sweaty - not such a good look lol.
I haven't weighed myself in weeks. I haven't got a handle on eating too many treats and tbh I'm now too scared to see what the scales say. I don't think I've put anything on as my stomach is definitely smaller and less bloated but I won't have lost much either. I can control my meals, it's the sweet snacks I seem to be really struggling with.
I'm now waiting for a good 'dietbet' game to begin and I'll join in with that.
One meal I'm hooked on lately is chicken and noodles
I have no idea of the calorie content but it's certainly healthier than what I used to eat and takes just minutes to prepare.
Here's what I do.
Toss chicken pieces in Chinese 5 spice then fry them in coconut oil.
Once the chicken is cooked add stir fry veg and mushrooms and a few squirts of Soy sauce, then throw in a handful of egg noodles.
Serve on a bed of Spinach - num num!
Leanne and I are now in the second month of 'Insanity' and the workouts are really hard, kind of like being back to day 1, but we're still loving it.
This is pretty much my daily look now
Red and sweaty - not such a good look lol.
I haven't weighed myself in weeks. I haven't got a handle on eating too many treats and tbh I'm now too scared to see what the scales say. I don't think I've put anything on as my stomach is definitely smaller and less bloated but I won't have lost much either. I can control my meals, it's the sweet snacks I seem to be really struggling with.
I'm now waiting for a good 'dietbet' game to begin and I'll join in with that.
One meal I'm hooked on lately is chicken and noodles
I have no idea of the calorie content but it's certainly healthier than what I used to eat and takes just minutes to prepare.
Here's what I do.
Toss chicken pieces in Chinese 5 spice then fry them in coconut oil.
Once the chicken is cooked add stir fry veg and mushrooms and a few squirts of Soy sauce, then throw in a handful of egg noodles.
Serve on a bed of Spinach - num num!
Saturday, 8 February 2014
Isotonic sport drink
Today I had the worst Insanity workout ever despite it being one of my favourites of the set - Plyometric Cardio circuit.
The problem? A lack of Isotonic sport drink - we'd run out. I really didn't think a lack of the drink would affect a workout quite so much, I mean I discovered once during a 10k that not having it throughout the run resulted in me finishing the race and almost puking and incoherent but I thought I'd be able to get through an Insanity workout without one - I guess it shows just how hard these workouts with Shaun T actually are.
At one point during todays workout I declared I was stopping, luckily that statement disn't last and it only took a couple of seconds for me to say that I hadn't stopped a workout yet and wasn't about to start now. But throughout this workout I struggled for energy and constantly got cramp in my feet and glutes and had to keep stretching out, couple that with no energy and it made for a pretty crappy workout.
I've now restocked the Lucozade sport drink but I'm certainly going to look into alternatives so that I have something for a backup if we run out again.
The problem? A lack of Isotonic sport drink - we'd run out. I really didn't think a lack of the drink would affect a workout quite so much, I mean I discovered once during a 10k that not having it throughout the run resulted in me finishing the race and almost puking and incoherent but I thought I'd be able to get through an Insanity workout without one - I guess it shows just how hard these workouts with Shaun T actually are.
At one point during todays workout I declared I was stopping, luckily that statement disn't last and it only took a couple of seconds for me to say that I hadn't stopped a workout yet and wasn't about to start now. But throughout this workout I struggled for energy and constantly got cramp in my feet and glutes and had to keep stretching out, couple that with no energy and it made for a pretty crappy workout.
I've now restocked the Lucozade sport drink but I'm certainly going to look into alternatives so that I have something for a backup if we run out again.
Friday, 7 February 2014
Dairy milk chocolate!
So we're coming toward the end of the 4th week of 'Insanity' and I'm really excited about starting a whole new round of workouts once we complete next weeks recovery week.
So far Insanity has been insane and amazingly hard work but we've loved each and every workout and let's face it, who ever regrets working out!
Both Leanne and I saw fantastic improvements in our second fit test. I'm not sure whether the improvments are from fitness levels though or the determination to beat our last result so I'm going to do the next fit test without checking out my current results first and see what happens.
One thing I have noticed though is that all the moves I find difficult and put down to me being over weight and 40 something leanne finds difficult too and yet she's super slim and 20 years younger. I don't know what that proves other than no matter what size or age you are Insanity doesn't care!
Now if I could just get a handle on my food intake I'd be on track for super weight loss. I do fine during the day and eat perfect proportions and healthy meals but then Mr SG comes home (who happens to be super skinny and fit) and suddenly I'm craving sweet things :( I've also discovered that night time is an issue for me as well because I tend to want to settle in front of the tv with chocolate - especially with the cold dark nights.
I came up with a plan to keep me busy at night while watching tv - I've ordered some wool and needles and I'm going to be knitting baby clothes for my niece/god daughter who's expecting her first child. It's been a while since I clicked the old needles but I'm hoping I haven't lost the skill :)
I also have a new good reason to lose weight, we're looking into booking our holidays with our dear friends back home in England. We're not sure where it's going to be just yet but we should be hitting the Caribbean this time next year. This time last year the four of us were in Jamaica and there are certain things I regret all of which have roots in my weight. Holidays are so expensive nowadays that it seems stupid to pay all that money and not do all I can to make sure that I'm not uncomfortable and self conscious.
With this in mind I'm yet again trying to be more aware of what I'm eating, I can control portions no problem but I have to conquer this sweet tooth.
This is my achilles heel *Warning food porn ***
I could easily eat one of the family size large bars each and every day. In fact I could and have given up meals just so I can eat one of the large bars, not good is it! Especially as I get a pounding, racing heart after eating it - the nurse explained it's my body over producing something or other in an attempt to battle something the chocolate secretes. She also said I need to stop eating huge quantities - I completely understand how people hit the 600lb mark even though they know the food they eat is killing them!
So far Insanity has been insane and amazingly hard work but we've loved each and every workout and let's face it, who ever regrets working out!
Both Leanne and I saw fantastic improvements in our second fit test. I'm not sure whether the improvments are from fitness levels though or the determination to beat our last result so I'm going to do the next fit test without checking out my current results first and see what happens.
One thing I have noticed though is that all the moves I find difficult and put down to me being over weight and 40 something leanne finds difficult too and yet she's super slim and 20 years younger. I don't know what that proves other than no matter what size or age you are Insanity doesn't care!
Now if I could just get a handle on my food intake I'd be on track for super weight loss. I do fine during the day and eat perfect proportions and healthy meals but then Mr SG comes home (who happens to be super skinny and fit) and suddenly I'm craving sweet things :( I've also discovered that night time is an issue for me as well because I tend to want to settle in front of the tv with chocolate - especially with the cold dark nights.
I came up with a plan to keep me busy at night while watching tv - I've ordered some wool and needles and I'm going to be knitting baby clothes for my niece/god daughter who's expecting her first child. It's been a while since I clicked the old needles but I'm hoping I haven't lost the skill :)
I also have a new good reason to lose weight, we're looking into booking our holidays with our dear friends back home in England. We're not sure where it's going to be just yet but we should be hitting the Caribbean this time next year. This time last year the four of us were in Jamaica and there are certain things I regret all of which have roots in my weight. Holidays are so expensive nowadays that it seems stupid to pay all that money and not do all I can to make sure that I'm not uncomfortable and self conscious.
With this in mind I'm yet again trying to be more aware of what I'm eating, I can control portions no problem but I have to conquer this sweet tooth.
This is my achilles heel *Warning food porn ***
I could easily eat one of the family size large bars each and every day. In fact I could and have given up meals just so I can eat one of the large bars, not good is it! Especially as I get a pounding, racing heart after eating it - the nurse explained it's my body over producing something or other in an attempt to battle something the chocolate secretes. She also said I need to stop eating huge quantities - I completely understand how people hit the 600lb mark even though they know the food they eat is killing them!
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