Insanity Max30

I may as well start this by acknowledging a huge, bad, fat fact - it's been over 3 months since I last posted.
I don't know why - this blog was intended to be a journal of my weightloss journey so why I feel I cannot post when I'm floundering I don't quite understand.
Well, I'm floundering! At  least I WAS floundering, right on the abyss of wanting to lose weight but having zero motivation, zero energy and a staggeringly huge appetite.
Surprisingly (considering what I've been throwing down my gullet) my weight has not fluctuated to a great extent, I'm still lighter than I was at my heaviest (you see how I put that) but I haven't lost a teeny percentage of what I'm supposed to be aiming for.
I guess we've all been there - going from extreme motivation and determination to gradually convincing oneself that we really don't mind the way we are and that we should just learn to accept our body the way it currently is.
Well I was accepting my weight and body shape for the last 3 months, hence the mammoth amount of food I have consumed. I'm coming out the end of that particular self harming tunnel though and it's down to a couple of things
1) I happened across a new 'dietbet' challenge run by Tony Horton and I paid my $30 to enter before I had time to think what I was doing let alone time to talk myself out of it and
2) I go on holiday in 6 weeks and I had a very rare moment of deciding I was going to buy new clothes for the occassion. I'm one of those people who never ever buy clothes because I convince myself there's no point because I'm dieting and they won't fit me in a few months - 23 years later I still have those old clothes, which incidentally are coming back into fashion which would be a good thing if they actually fit me. So you see I kept all my old clothes and very rarely buy new ones unless I need a new pair of elasticated yoga pants for gardening or a fleece to hide my bulk.
But I digress - whilst looking at the clothes (online of course, I'd never humiliate myself by looking in changing room mirrors) I suddenly realised I didn't know what size to order and the thought of wasting time buying something the wrong size just made me all anxious.
So I decided enough was enough (this was yesterday by the way) and suddenly had an urge to work out - yes, I really did just say an urge to work out - so I found myself doing Day1 of Insanity Max30 with Shaun T.
Anyone who reads this blog will know what a fan I am of original Insanity - that work out is amazing and definitely my all time favourite, but each workout can take 1 hour and I'm reluctant to do that right now so I tried the new Insanity Max 30 - each workout is 30 minutes long whish is so much more doable.
Firstly let me just say DAAAAAAMN! I was expecting it to be much easier than Insanity - WRONG! If I had had the energy to write down my Max out figure it wouldn't have been much more than 1 minute - that's ridiculous.
I did Tabata power today and again DAAAAAMN! I'm having to modify every move right now which I never did in Insanity, I don't know if it's because I'm a year or so older or whether I am the unfittest I have even been in my life but I seriously struggled. Wake up call or what!

Once I've completed the first week of Insanity Max30 I'll do a review up to that point and then continue to post updates and progress reports thereafter - I finally have something health/weight related to talk about.
BTW my goal according to Dietbet is 8lbs in 4 weeks - I'm aiming for 10lbs!

Weighing up the enemy

Please be patient as I vent my frustration.

Watching a programme tonight titled "weighing up the enemy" caused much controversy and disagreement in the SG household - dare I say voices were even raised (mainly mine lol).
This programme pits 2 contestants against each other to see who could lose the most weight, but the controversy began when ' plus size awards ' were shown and were followed by household comments of "what the fuck"?
It seems that a certain mentality of people believe that such awards glorify and promote being over weight. The fact that for decades ridiculously skinny people and often unhealthy sized women have been promoted in magazines, on cat walks, in films etc is somehow acceptable. Super skinny models are recognised for their beauty despite unhealthy eating habits being employed to keep them there, designers promote their clothing ranges that do not fit figures above a 14 and yet these guys find that acceptable- it was even suggested a couple of times that you never see ribby models!! WTF!
I'm not suggesting that those skinny models should not be recognised for their achievements but why shouldn't plus size models be shown the same respect? Marilyn Monroe was once considered to have the most enviable of figures, yet now she is considered 'plus size' - it's sad and ridiculous.
People need to understand how ridiculed and persecuted plus size women have been for so so long - clothes were not available off the rack and what was available wasn't cut to fit plus size women, so when designers decided to cash in on this niche in the market it was to be welcomed.
However it seems some people in this household believe that plus size models should not be recognised nor awarded because they believe it will encourage and/ or promote weight gain. They fail to see that it could actually empower women to feel good about themselves which in turn could actually encourage health and weight loss and they also fail to recognise that some people are overweight through medication or health issues and cannot help the way they look so I say why shouldn't they be given the same air time and acceptance as skinny models.
At one point I asked if they thought 2 ladies in wedding gowns looked nice - I thought they did and tbh they couldn't have been much bigger than a size 16/18 (my current size), to which the response was an emphatic "no, not that size"
I wonder if they realised that they were actually telling me that I too do not look nice!

Rant over!