I never expected this weight loss journey to be as simple as going from A to B but I seem to be detouring to every other letter from C to Z and I'm beginning to feel like a complete loser. Why on earth am I so flaky when it comes to weight Loss! I mean its hardly rocket science is it, I don't even have to stop eating all the things I love like chocolate etc, I simply have to stop eating it every day. So why the heck do I give in to temptation so easily?
Yesterday I did relatively good - a healthy breakfast and a healthy cooked meal at night but then I spotted 'master of taste American style brownie' ice cream in the freezer and I knew from that point I was fighting a losing battle. At first I just had a quarter of it and put it back ( a total first for me) and then later on I had a late bath to divert my mind from it. All was well - until I got out of the bath and in some weird automatic mode went and got the ice cream and finished it off in bed!!

Nutritional information for this ice cream informs me that I ate around 1000 calories and approx 68g of fat. Great.....just bloody great!
Note to self: when you next go food shopping do not convince yourself that you'll ration it this time - it hasn't happened the last 10 times and next time won't be any different.

While I'm whipping myself I may as well be honest and say that the 5/50 challenge was well and truly blown out of the water on roughly day 5. I can tell myself that it's down to lack of time but that's an outrageous over statement - it's easy to find time. I may as well just admit to myself that I'm either lazy or flaky or just not committed or even a combination of all three.
I love the idea of working out and I really want to start running again but getting the motivation to get going is proving ridiculously hard. Do they sell it in shops I wonder!!

Weight loss this week - 2lbs.

Exercise - oh boy!

Week 1 weigh in - a measly 1lb lost. Yes, I know it's better than nothing or eek - 1lb on but I had hoped for maybe a tad more.
I guess I should have been ready for it though because we had a 2 day power cut due to atrocious storms and I have to admit that I ate whatever was easy to eat during a power cut - basically rubbish.
Combine rubbish eating with no exercise and I guess I should be grateful for the 1lb loss.

I have the exercise front under some sort of control now. I want to begin running but I need to build my lungs up to it after the chest infection so I've begun a 5/50 challenge that my sister drew my attention to.
It's basically a commitment to 5k of exercise a day for 50 days, this can be anything from walking, running, swimming, cycling etc or a combination of them.
5k is certainly a doable distance isn't it, my problem is going to be remembering to do it every day, I'm only on day 2 and I almost forgot today lol.
I'm also going to introduce a squat and a crunch challenge on Monday just to add some interest. The squat challenge I've chosen is this one

I figured this one would be less boring than the same old squat day in, day out. The technique for these squats is available here at 'Well-girl'.

The crunch challenge will be this one

Again, I thought this would be a bit different to the usual crunch or sit up and would also work on the waist which is always an issue for me.

Weighing up the enemy

Please be patient as I vent my frustration.

Watching a programme tonight titled "weighing up the enemy" caused much controversy and disagreement in the SG household - dare I say voices were even raised (mainly mine lol).
This programme pits 2 contestants against each other to see who could lose the most weight, but the controversy began when ' plus size awards ' were shown and were followed by household comments of "what the fuck"?
It seems that a certain mentality of people believe that such awards glorify and promote being over weight. The fact that for decades ridiculously skinny people and often unhealthy sized women have been promoted in magazines, on cat walks, in films etc is somehow acceptable. Super skinny models are recognised for their beauty despite unhealthy eating habits being employed to keep them there, designers promote their clothing ranges that do not fit figures above a 14 and yet these guys find that acceptable- it was even suggested a couple of times that you never see ribby models!! WTF!
I'm not suggesting that those skinny models should not be recognised for their achievements but why shouldn't plus size models be shown the same respect? Marilyn Monroe was once considered to have the most enviable of figures, yet now she is considered 'plus size' - it's sad and ridiculous.
People need to understand how ridiculed and persecuted plus size women have been for so so long - clothes were not available off the rack and what was available wasn't cut to fit plus size women, so when designers decided to cash in on this niche in the market it was to be welcomed.
However it seems some people in this household believe that plus size models should not be recognised nor awarded because they believe it will encourage and/ or promote weight gain. They fail to see that it could actually empower women to feel good about themselves which in turn could actually encourage health and weight loss and they also fail to recognise that some people are overweight through medication or health issues and cannot help the way they look so I say why shouldn't they be given the same air time and acceptance as skinny models.
At one point I asked if they thought 2 ladies in wedding gowns looked nice - I thought they did and tbh they couldn't have been much bigger than a size 16/18 (my current size), to which the response was an emphatic "no, not that size"
I wonder if they realised that they were actually telling me that I too do not look nice!

Rant over!

Raspberry keytone plus and Colon cleanse

It doesn't seem to matter how much I want to lose weight, I - along with so many others - just seem to go through a cycle of weightloss / weightgain and while I'm no heavier than I was several months ago I'm also no lighter.
I've been running lately hoping by some miracle it will be enough to drop 2 stone overnight but guess what.....it isn't! Who knew!!!
Our holiday to Mexico is now just 7 weeks away, I've put off buying nice clothes for it just in case I miraculously lose weight and need a smaller size. It sounded like a good plan at the time but summer is now over and all the shops have their winter range of clothes in store and I'm now left hoping and praying I can still get into the clothes currently sitting in my wardrobe that I haven't worn since our last holiday almost 2 years ago. Some things never change I guess.

I've never been one to buy into weightloss pills that promise extreme weightloss in less than a month and those fat binding pills available from the doctor really do not interest me either - oh, the horror stories I've read about those.
So I was a little surprised that I found myself ordering a bottle of Raspberry Keytone plus and a bottle of Colon cleanser from 'Evolution slimming'

We've all heard about Raspberry keytones right? We've heard all the rave reviews and claims that it's the supplement all the stars are using?
Well I decided nothing ventured, nothing gained, I'll give them a go and see how they work for me. Obviously they're not a miracle cure for obesity, diet and exercise also has to play a part but I figured they were a gentle enough supplement that wouldn't result in desperate dashes to the loo to eliminate all that fat that the body can't process from using some of those other weight loss pills.
Well I was sort of right and also sort of wrong:


Day 2 of the Raspberry Keytones and the Colon Cleanse (yes, I did just say day 2) and I found just how quick they are to work. The day I started them hubby and I decided we would make the 2 hour trip to Inverness the next day so I decided not to take the night time Colon Cleanse tablets 'just in case'. We got up at 5am and I took 2 Colon Cleanse tablets as instructed and took the Keytones with me to have before breakfast. Within 30 minutes of driving to Inverness my bowels weren't just moving they were making the most awful noises and 40 minutes into the drive I was feeling really uncomfortable and experiencing wave after wave of needing to use the loo. As each wave died down I would be relieved only to find it start up again a few minutes later - I never use public loos so the thought of having to go was making me feel really anxious too.
After 1.5 hours we made it to Morrisons supermarket for a loo break - damn thing was shut! I couldn't believe I would have to wait another 30 minutes and use Inverness train station loos - by this point my bum cheeks were screaming in agony from all the clenching!
At several points I honestly feared I would have to use a field and wet wipes - oh the shame!
We finally make it to Inverness and thankfully it was still early morning so there were hardly any people milling about and absolutely no one in the loos - this was a blessing not just for me but for all those that could have witnessed a mass evacuation.
Once the deed was done I hightailed it out of the station and never looked back. Instead of lingering around Inverness as we usually would do we hit 2 shops, the bank and then came straight home - just in time for the next wave of colon cleansing!
Last night was spent making trips to the loo and trying to cope with awful stomach cramps.
I'd almost decided to stop taking the colon cleanse, instead I have lowered the dose to 1 tablet twice a day just for today and then I will resume normal doseage - I just won't be able to leave the home while I'm on them.
Apparantly this bowel movement is normal behaviour at the beginning of the course so anyone thining of taking these needs to be aware of this and know how they can work around it.
As for the Raspberry keytones, well I won't know until weigh day on Monday whether they have helped with any weightloss but I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed.

Focus T25 + Nutribullet

I'm pretty useless at keeping this blog updated. Probably because I feel that every post seems to be a negative one and I've never really been one for posting random life stuff just for some blog content - I like reading it of other people but don't really think my lifes journey makes a very interesting read for other people.

This latest weightloss attempt has been pretty pathetic to say the least. I start of brilliantly and focused on healthy eating but as soon as I start to lose weight and feel healthier I gradually start over eating again. I've used every excuse under the sun for what I do but the upshot of it is that it's me thatputs the food in my mouth, it's me that says "just one won't hurt", it's me that says "I've been good all week so....." and it's me that says "You're fine as you are" in those weak moments when I just can't resist that bar of chocolate.
'They' say that admitting it is the hardest part - bollox! That's the sodding easy part - "My name is Linda and I overeat, eat too much chocolate and can't control it" - see easy! And I mean every bit of it, I'm not just saying it. So I waited for this sudden epithany and a weakening of the want for chocolate and guess what - I'm still waiting!!

I now have just 4 months or so until we go to Mexico and I was supposed to have lost a significant amount of weight by this point. As it is I do not know what I weigh because I'm gotten all scared of the scales again.
A few days ago I decided I was going to do exactly what I am against me doing - I was going to go on some kind of meal replacement plan and lose weight fast. I don't want to lose weight fast because of the increased chance of loose skin but what the heck - desperate times and all that.
Then I came to my senses - that kind of diet is not for me and I'm not doing it. Instead I have bought myself a nutribullet. After the fiasco with the Vitamix I was hesitant to get a juice machine again but my mum has recently bought one and says they're fabulous, so that's the route I am going.
My breakfast will be a healkthy smoothie instead of cereal with milk and sometimes my lunch will be a healthy smoothie instead of either nothing or something that involves bread. Then I will simply have a healthy meal at night and eat as much fruit as I like. Sorted!

I've also started 'Focus T25' with my daughter, a Shaun T workout five days a week for only 25 minutes though don't let the amount of time fool you into thinking it's an easy workout - it really isn't.

Nutribullet + Focus T25 = weightloss (it has to).

Once I find some delicious recipes especially ones that help get me through a T25 workout I'll be posting them on here :)

Moodgym

I came across a particular website many years ago when I was once again fighting depression, until now I had forgotten all about it but it appeared in my recent google searches while looking for mind/thought help to combat all these negative feelings I have.
The site is called 'Moodgym'

"MoodGYM is an interactive program designed to help you:

• Identify whether you are having problems with emotions like anxiety and depression,
• Learn skills that can help you cope with these emotions.

MoodGYM is based on two programs which are successful in preventing and treating depression and anxiety. These are: Cognitive Behaviour Therapy and Interpersonal Therapy."

It's a free to use interactive site where you complete various assessments to assess your current state of thinking and helps you to understand the destructive impact it has on your day to day life, it then helps to teach you how to re-programme the brain into looking at situations differently and thinking differently thereby increasing positive thought while banishing the negative.
Again it's a slow process but I'm already enlightened after only a couple of exercises. I know that depression is a strong force in me and I'm usually able to recognise when the Black dog (depression) is snarling and when he's just assertively watching. To be honest I didn't think I was particularly depressed of late, that is until I started answering the interactive questions on Moodgym and now I can see that while I may not feel particularly weepy or sad right now, the feeling of nothing is another symptom of the Black dog and my interactive results really opened my eys to this.

My Moodgym result for the "Depression test"  was in the "High to very high range" and my results for the "Anxiety test" were in "The middle range" (basically no different to the average person).

Like I said I was surprised at the depression result, I didn't realise that some of the things I think were depressive symptoms though I can now see how negative they are.
I'm certainly looking forward to learning to cope with these thoughts and hopefully they will eventually help me to lose weight.

Those weightloss bonuses

I'm currently at a loss of 10lb in this weight loss journey and I've noticed a couple of weird things

1. I now know what it feels like to have an empty belly. That may sound strange but as an ex comfort eater I never really allowed myself to be truly hungry. Don't get me wrong there were so many times when I thought I was Hank Marvin (starving) but I can see now that on a scale of one to 10 I probably wasn't even at a 5. It's kinda pretty cool to have an empty stomach and not feel the need to fill it.
2. The coolest thing - Us 'not so slim' girls have probably all been there, you're in the bath and reach forward for the soap or whatever and you reach and reach and reach and nope, you can't quite make it cos the jelly roll gets in the way so you have to scooch forward until your face is literally touching the end so you can get what you need. Well I can now reach without scooching and it's a fabulous feeling.
3. The healthiest thing - I have suffered with acid reflux for as long as I can remember. I get it every single day and it can be so dibilitating. I've always assumed it was caused by my medication as it's listed as a side effect so I just accept it. Not any more - in the 28 days of Dietbet I did not suffer with acid reflux once and I cannot even begin to explain how nice that is.
4.  The ickiest thing - IBS - how many of us suffer from it? After being diagnosed with this about 20 years ago I was told to basically figure out what causes it and stop eating it - simple as that. I would love it if it had been that easy because whereas some sufferers go to the loo alot with it I hardly went at all - once a week on a good week - so not a comfortable feeling. Anyway I haven't been bloated for the entire 28 days and thanks to the Shreddies for breakfast and cutting out wheat in bread I am now regular as clock work.

I'm just looking forward to all the other benefits of weightloss as they show themselves.

Here's my Dietbet weigh in and weigh out photos - just 10lb down and I already see an improvement on the bulldog arms

According to this useless information poster I have lost the amount of chemical additives that an American consumes in a year.

Managed a 4 mile trail run with Leanne today. The weather was quite warm though and caught me unawares so I didn't have water to hand - have to make sure that doesn't happen again it wasn't a pleasant experience.
I'm still getting either numb feet or cramped feet halfway into the run and I really can't figure out what is causing it. I thought maybe my trainers but I tried 2 other pairs and I get the same thing, I really need to figure this out because running with no feeling or running in excruciating pain is beginning to wear a little.
I'm really working on my breathing as I run too. If I breathe through the chest it's a sure fire way to suffer with side stitch so I'm attempting to perfect the art (and it is a flippin art) of breathing through my diaphragm. The difference is amazing, since breathing this way I have not suffered from stitch and even if I forget to breathe properly and a stitch begins to show itself diaphragm breathing settles it right back down.
I once read in a running magazine that diaphragm breathing is our natural way to breathe and that we learn the habit of chest breathing as we get older. As an example the article suggested watching a baby breathe when it's lying on its back - it's the stomach you will see move not the chest. My husband is the only person I know that still naturally breathes through the diaphragm and not the chest.