Wednesday 9 October 2013

Hello darkness my old friend!




Crikey, has it really been 6 days since I last blogged on here?
I still haven't run and the longer I leave it the less appealing it is becoming. The main problem has been that the nights are getting darker and it's the only time Mr SG can run cos he works all day but the real problem now is that he has damaged his back so can't run anyway. I keep saying I'll get out on my own but I never do.
The Black dog (depression) has been content in his kennel for months it seems but gradually over the past week or so he's gone from warning growls to snapping at my heels - hence the post title. I'm now seriously struggling to get him to back down and for a while I didn't want to, the darkness was so familiar - how destructive is that!
I know the steps I have to take to shut him up and exercise is one of them, it's just so bloody difficult when all I want to do is hide in a corner and listen to the silence.

I'm going to stop this moany, whinging, sad post right now and in future I will run with the concept that if I have nothing nice to say then I'll say nothing at all............I'll just play it out in little stick men images instead lol.

Anyway just bear with me while I sort this guy out


4 comments:

  1. Taking a dog on a walk/jog is a pleasure. Don't think so hard. And you can't possibly be more ridiculous or weird than Keebler and I running together. His legs are about 8 inches long! Our jogging is so funny and slow!!! :D

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    1. The Black dog is a metaphor for depression Marion lol. It kinda helps to give depression an identity and thinking of it as a Black Dog really does help when it comes to explaining how I feel and learning to get him under control. Thinking of depression in that way also removes some of the stigma attached to it - for me anyways.
      I do love running with my dogs though :) It's a tad difficult because they're big dogs (Great Dane & GSD) and they tend to weave for the first while which can be weird for people watching - it must look like we have some strange running dance going on for the first 5 minutes lol.
      Thank you for popping by Marion

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  2. I had major depression about 10 years ago Linda. Suicidal and all sorts of things. Saw someone for awhile and on anti-depressants for about a year. Know how you feel for sure. I'm fine now, but I have a melancholic personality, so I work on trying to "just let things go". It works sometimes. Like when I'm sick. I get into a real bad head space and the longer I'm sick the more depressed I get. I begin to worry I won't ever get well again and this is how it's going to be the rest of my life...but of course I always get better. And here I am with no exercise, no running and having a party with food. But after a couple of antibiotics and one prednisone I am feeling a little better. Maybe next week I'll go for a short walk, then a longer one, and then try running again. Got Epson Salts on my shopping list for the city on Tuesday. I hope what I read about it being good for sore feet is right. Everything on the internet is ALWAYS right, right ha ha. Sorry you're feeling depressed. I know how hard it is to handle. Chin up sport!

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    1. Glad to hear you are feeling a little better. I too have a melancholic personality - I sincerely believe I came into this world this way as it's been with me in some form another for as long as I can remember. I read the book 'Taming the black dog' and it gave me the knowledge I needed to accept that it's part of who I am and learn little tricks to gain control back when the dog is snapping and snarling and has me running for the covers.
      I'm much better now, waynes back took all of 2 days to heal but now I have damaged mine again - will I never learn lol.
      Let us all know how you get on as you start to get back to exercise :)

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