I've been watching Dr Phil for the first time today, I just happened across one of his shows on Youtube and I was hooked.
Obviously the weight loss ones are of most interest to me as I can relate to what people are saying in response to Dr Phils questioning. Like when he asked a guy on episode 'Fat, furious and fedup' why he was so overweight, the guy really didn't know the answer to the question but it got me asking myself the same thing.
I've often heard the idea that the key to understanding the destructive habit of overeating is to understand what started the habit in the first place and that, for me is an even harder question to answer. I've always had food issues and a negative relationship with food but also with my body so maybe that is part of the equation with me.
I was a slim child and stayed that way into young adulthood but I do remember 2 particular instances that stick in my mind and probably effected me in ways I didn't realise. One time a friend and I were walking to the shops all dressed up and feeling pretty good and a group of lads laughed and pointed at my ankles claiming they looked like "they're gonna snap", another time I was standing on tiptoe putting a poster on my bedroom wall (again dressed up ready to go out) and my sister quite innocently claimed that my calves made me look like "Rambo in a dress" (I was extremely slim and toned from exercise and having a horse). Both those statements have stayed with me to this day so I think I can assume they play a negative role in how I think now.
Anyway back to Dr Phil.
Dr Phil went on to question this guy about his reasons (excuses) he hadn't managed to lose weight yet despite claiming he'd made numerous attempts - his excuses astounded even me and included allergy to exercise, not sure footed enought to walk in the dark, the gym smelt funny and the one we've all used at some point - it's genetic!
But then Dr Phil made a statement that really hit home for me, he was referencing this guys battle with weightloss and was acknowledging that we all get to the point where we think we've gained too much now and that the journey to lose it is just too long. When the guy agreed, Dr Phil said to him "You think the journey is too long but whether you lose weight or not, you will still be here this time next year".
I've been trying to lose weight for about 22 years now though for the first 10 or so I only had pounds to lose though I believed I had stones to lose - this was a very warped view of my bodyweight on my part.
But Dr Phils statement made me realise something - I always view weightloss, diets, failures etc by looking at the past - what I was doing this time last year or where I was weightwise 5 years ago. I can see the destructive patterns of the last 22 years and I'm constantly focusing on past attempts thinking 'what's the point in trying, I've gone too far now?'. But I've never thought to look ahead of time, what I will be or could be this time next year and suddenly Dr Phils statement made so much sense - If I don't lose weight because I feel it takes too long to do it then this time next year I'll still be in this exact same situation and I'll have given up another whole year of my life to this battle.